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REVIEW: “Eivissa” by AJ Llewellyn

ABOUT:

When an amnesiac man capsizes on the shores of Spain’s sun-kissed island of Eivissa, bar owner Demetrio Reyes thinks he’s found his someone…or has he?

Demetrio has found the good life, putting his devastating
past behind him and investing his hard-earned money into a gay bar on the island of Ibiza, or as the locals insist on calling it, Eivissa. With celebrities and other stunning, beautiful men roaming the hot-spot island, Demetrio thinks he’s found a slice of heaven.

When a strange man’s small boat capsizes in the Mediterranean, once he’s rescued, he seems to be attracted to Demetrio. The man however, has amnesia. He has no memory of his name, his life and has no ID. His boat is registered to a Philip Gordon but the handsome stranger says he doesn’t think it’s his name. After picking the name Océano, the Spanish word for the sea, he and Demetrio begin an impassioned affair that soon turns disastrous. Océano may not be amnesiac. He may not be the good guy he seems to be and… he may not even be gay.

 

BOOK INFO:
Eivissa coverTitle: Eivissa
Author: AJ Llewellyn
Publisher: Dreamspinner Press
Pages: 99
Release Date: April 22, 2015
Purchase Links: Dreamspinner

REVIEW:

Bad coffee. Bad wine. Bad books.

I find it difficult to choke down all of the above, but after this novella I would happily drink sludge and sour wine. I nearly quit numerous times and that’s just not like me. It takes a LOT for me to want to give up. It wasn’t just a few things that bothered me; I can honestly say it was the entire package.

I’ve been on an amnesia trope kick lately and this was not what I was looking for. Not even close. The blurb gave it great promise but it failed to reach any of my expectations.

Allow me to give you a quick run down….

Demetrio quit his day job and went after his dream of island life. He bought a bar on an Evissia and quickly befriended his bar neighbors. Soon after the story begins, they rescue a man capsized at sea. Said man is injured and suffering from amnesia. All of the characters were shallow and flat. Not only did I lack any connection to them, but I didn’t even like them. Their dialogue was exasperating and the plot was extremely far-fetched. I’ll be the first to admit I am drawn to over-the-top romance. I don’t mind flufftastic and mushy love affairs. The ship definitely sank if that was the goal.

I think the intention was to touch on erotic and exotic mixed with an extremely sweet romance. It certainly was erotic but it was more sleazy than smokin’ hot. It was exotic yet despite the white sand and breathtaking sunsets I had absolutely no desire to visit. The island was practically one giant orgy and that’s just not my cuppa. Not trying to be judgmental, but if I won a free ticket to this top vacation spot, I would gladly pass it off to another willing soul. And the romance? I didn’t get it, I didn’t see it, and I didn’t feel it. I didn’t even think they liked one another? Color me confused.

So you see, I could hardly stomach the guys, their paradise did nothing for me, and I cringed when they spoke. The memory loss was carelessly handled (he wasn’t sure his sexual orientation and then was in the driver seat cruising along anal alley in the next scene) and scenes were so out of place I was frequently tossed right out of the story. At one point Océano  (yeahhh, that’s what they deemed their John Doe…cuz he came out of the sea!) had just be released from the hospital and was recovering from sun poisoning and they proceeded to get him drunk. Drink after drink after drink. Probably not very wise. This was simply one instance of the complete and utter lack of common sense these men demonstrated. Sometimes I can brush it aside and suspend reality, but I no matter how much I tried here, I couldn’t.

I typically do not quote, but this snippet of convo gives a primo example of my annoyance…

“‘Forget about me, D. I can only bring you pain.’

‘No. I love you.’

‘Fuck! Don’t love me.’

‘Sorry, but I do.'”

It that doesn’t tell you all you need to know, then I don’t know what else to say.

My mother always said to try and say something nice to offset the unpleasantness of frank honesty; Soooo, the cover is very pretty.

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This entry was posted on June 3, 2015 by in Contemporary, Reviewer: Sheri and tagged , , .

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